Living with the End in Mind

As my FaceBook friends know, I have been supportive of the work of the End in Mind Project, a nonprofit founded by MPR journalist Cathy Wurzer in furtherance of her work with the late Bruce Kramer. My involvement started out as a volunteer photographer, memorializing events hosted by Cathy and giving me the opportunity to repeatedly receive the message of living life to the fullest at each of life's stages.

Cathy and the organization encourage us to live more and fear less. Inevitably, we all die. Communicating with loved ones and friends about how we want to face the inevitable, while still an unscheduled certainty, frees us to celebrate the lives and relationships we have right up until when we don't.

The last few weeks have sharply focused the need for the lessons of the End in Mind Project. Rather than being some amorphous concept that we'll deal with when we have time, Death has come calling globally in the form of Covid-19. Death teases us, leaving us to wonder if we will be part of the 40% likely to become infected, part of the 20% of the infected who experience serious health problems, or among the 3% of the virus' hosts who do not survive.

The reality of the situation we find ourselves in, forced to self-isolate, unable to carry on normal day-to-day activities like going to school or movies or restaurants, and clueless about if and when things will ever be "normal" again, gives considerable pause. It's as if we are in a perpetual backwards day and the concept of living more and fearing less seems other worldly.

Somewhere around the age of 8, Ian Fleming conveyed a life lesson that I've taken to heart for 60 years. He included a haiku in You Only Live Twice:

You only live twice
Once when you're born
And once when you look death in the face.


Over the years, I've had different thoughts about the meaning of the poem. But today, as we're all looking Death in the face, I accept the lesson as an admonishment not to waste this second life.

I have no way of knowing if I am going to survive this pandemic but I refuse to wallow in anxiety and self-pity waiting to find out. Life is much different than it was two months ago. But it is life.

While taking recommended steps to reduce my risk of being infected, I am not disassociating from everything dear to me. I can keep up with family and friends on social media and by phone or video conferencing. While I'd prefer meeting over a vodka with extra olives at the Monte, electronic discourse and full pours at home will suffice for now. My Amazon Prime, HBO, Showtime, Disney+, AppleTV, and Netflix options are overwhelming. I'm finally getting around to reading James Clavell's Gaijin. I've put that off forever because once I'm done, there are no Clavell chronicles left to read. Under the circumstances (the part about not knowing if I'll survive), it's time.

Let's all take Cathy Wurzer's lead and find ways to live as fully as possible in the face of adversity and notwithstanding the ultimate inevitability. Go to www.endinmindproject.org for information on the nonprofit and its work, resources to draw on, and the opportunity to provide financial support.